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book review
Karma by Muharikah | Book Review
June 11, 2020
Karma is the sequel of Stigma, written by the same author. This book was
bought during previous BBW, and I somehow know that there will be another
sequel (the last one) for this series, I decided to postpone reading it till
Dilema comes out :)
I can't imagine of waiting for Dilema after dealing with Karma.
Title: Stigma
Author: Muharikah
Pages: 419
Publisher: Iman Publication
Publication Date: March 2019
While Stigma introduced the main characters, Karma is more focus on the
relationships between Dr Iman & Dr Faris who got married together and how
they managed their relationship with their hidden history. Dr Iman as we all
know, is the boss in the ward that Dr Faris works in so it is undeniable that
Dr Iman has the dominant side of her as a leader. While Dr Faris is still
fighting with his struggle, unfortunately both of them were surprised with
sudden bad news - Dr Faris has a lymphoma! And turned out he is HIV positive
too. Dealing with both situations, we can see how both of them trying their
best to save the marriage, though I feel mixed feeling with the ending. T_T
Based on online dictionary,
"Karma - (in Hinduism and Buddhism) the sum of a person's actions in this and previous states of existence, viewed as deciding their fate in future existences." - https://www.lexico.com/en/definition/karma
I love the quote :)
1. "Let the husband lead the family."
I am attracted to this part, maybe because I am still new in this relationship
thingy, to be exact... approaching 10 months of marriage. Alhamdulillah. :)
I got the feeling when Faris' position is below Iman at the hospital, but
Faris is still Iman's husband to be respected. Point noted.
Well, if you guys have been reading the blog for a quite some time, I guess
you can see how independent I can be... especially with those solo travels.
Yeah, I can be dominant too. But, I think through out times, I prefer being
the follower. :D No matter how I am able to do something at home, I will try
my best to include my husband in the decision making so that nobody feels left
out. InsyAllah!
2. "Medical service is about human act and human touch."
This is also another reminder to me as a health care worker :)
I have love-hate feeling when attending patient as I can't help to feel
annoyed every time I met some kind of cases / patients like:
- accidents involving patients under 18, especially if they are not wearing helmet and do not even have license!
- accidents involving drunkens!
- patients who came in a worsened condition just because they ARE NOT COMPLIANT TO MEDICATIONS!
- patients who came at 3 o'clock in the morning for something they already have for months and years and they don't even bother to get it checked before.
- yada yada. Hahaha.
Banyak betul complaints. But, insyAllah for other cases, I am trying my best
to give the best with the best attitude :)
|
|
Aha... quite a number of cases that I have attended involving huge
stress or poor management of it that lead to suicidal attempt - taking
paracetamol in huge doses (for eg: telan Panadon 4 papan!), drinking
Paraquat (herbicides to control weeds). |
3. "Tidak ada karma dalam Islam."
"Yang ada adalah ketentuan dan takdir Allah yang telah diatur buat kepentingan
manusia itu sendiri. Setiap perkara yang Allah takdirkan, sudah pasti ada
kebaikannya, walaupun kita membencinya."
In this novel, Iman feels like she has done too much sins that Allah is
punishing her with lots of challenges. And I think this is the answer to the
challenges :)
4. Miracles
"Allah itu Maha Baik, kan kak? Setiap yang pergi, sudah pasti ada
pengganti."
Faris passed away. He did not the survive despite completing the chemotherapy
etc as the cancer has spread to the whole body. To be honest, this is such a
sad new especially after the patient has consistently compliant to all
appointments and medications - seems that the limit of our knowledge and
ability given by Allah.
But, to know a good news after the sad one... is so refreshing :)
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Iman is pregnant! |
SM, Perak, Malaysia
200611
Stigma by Muharikah | Book Review
June 10, 2020
I bought Stigma during a book fair if I am not mistaken and finished reading
it at that time. Just because I recently bought the sequels of the novel which
are Karma and Dilema, I decided to reread Stigma so that I don't have to get
confused with the characters. :)
Okay, what can I say about Stigma?
Title: Stigma
Author: Muharikah
Pages: 351
Publisher: Iman Publication
Publication Date: April 2018
Maybe we can start with a rough synopsis?
The novel portrays a life story with a medical background; Dr Iman Syahirah is
the main character in the story, a medical specialist (a.k.a general
physician) in an infectious disease ward, Dr Faris, a medical officer who work
together in the same ward. They are in charge of patients with HIV / AIDS and
the story plays around this topic.
Here come Dr Aleph, a cardiologist who ended up as Dr Iman's best
friend.
One thing that makes me excited (yet scared) - all of them have the same
internal challenge - attracted to same gender but struggling to live a normal,
blessed life.
Yeah, it is scary because it is uncommon for me to see people in medical
fields who are LGBTQ and to be honest I am not sure how to react if I meet
any. T_T There are some people that I know, but we are not that close... so
that's it.
I don't want to comment much on the story line as it really depends on the
preference of readers. Some may say the story presentation is a bit dull as it
contains quite a lot of medical stuffs, but I don't have much problem with it
as I have that background too. Yet, the author already explained every terms
she used.
And maybe I am still a newbie with Malay novels, I find the book to be okay :)
So, as usual, what I love about doing book reviews is more towards what I have
learned from the book hihi... let's go! :)
1. "Cuma Iman takut. Dalam dia menarik orang lain keluar dari kegelapan, mana tahu dia pula yang tenggelam di dalamnya."
This is when Iman shared with her best friend, Zarith after Iman met Aleph in
a conference I think. Aleph is actually a lady whose appearance is like a guy,
a gentleman. At that time, Aleph was actually attracted to Iman and trying to
hit on her.... hehe okay kat sini rasa semacam kejap.
But what I like about both of them, they finally know about each others' past
and struggles to change, even trying to support the process.
About the verses, to be honest, I don't much experience dealing with LGBTQ,
but the verses sound so good, reminds me on how people afraid to get involved
with people having bad issues because they are afraid if in case they got
influenced to do the same.
Here, I am surprised to read that Faris furthered his studies in Jordan, while
Iman in Egypt. Although they were in Islamic countries, they were still
exposed to LGBTQ too. Maknanya, study negara Barat akan terdedah dengan budaya
ni, rupanya di negara Arab sekalipun. Ahaa...
2. "The struggle is real."
This verse is quoted quite a lot through out the book.
When Iman trying to counsel her patients about changing the lifestyle, I
realised people who are LGBTQ somehow know their preferences are wrong but at
the same time, they also feel there's nothing can be done because they are
born that way.
"Tapi, saya tak rasa saya ada pilihan pun, doktor! Dari kecil lagi saya
suka kat lelaki. Saya dah cuba untuk suka perempuan! Saya memang tak
boleh! Saya rasa geli!" - Johan
"Percayalah Johan. Kita semua ada pilihan. Cuma kita selalu biarkan nafsu
dan perasaan buat pilihan untuk kita. I know, the struggle is real. Tapi
yakinlah, jika awak benar-benar mahu berubah, Allah akan bantu awak." -
Iman
From this conversation, I can imagine what if the advice given by Iman was
actually given by someone else who is straight? The LGBTQ may even say that...
"kau tak faham pun perasaan ni", in another word, we are saying out of
empathy. Only if the patient know that the doctor herself was in the same
shoes!
Anyway, yeah. Memang challenging untuk ubah nafsu. The feeling is real. The
love. The preferences.
"Bukan hak kita untuk judge orang, Faris. Setiap orang tu pasti ada
pengalaman silam dia. Ada trigger yang menjadikan mereka begitu. Ada
seorang pesakit ni jadi gay sebab kena liwat dengan abang-abang senior
sekolah asrama. Bila you dengar cerita mereka, you will understand and
appreciate their struggles. Dari situ, awak boleh bantu mereka untuk
berubah dan kembali kepada Allah." - Iman.
This makes me reflects a lot about my impression every time I met patients
with known case of hepatitis, retroviral disease (RVD) etc. Some may even got
the disease from husband / wife or even blood transfusion (though it is rare).
We usually call them as 'biohazard patient', more towards our preparation to
protect ourselves with PPE.
Maksudnya, bila nak ambik darah, kena pakai double gloves - walaupun kalau nak
ditakdirkan tercucuk, tercucuk jugak. Getah lawan jarum, siapa menang? T_T
3. "Hati kita ni, Allah yang punya. Serahkan hati kita kepada Allah."
"Dah lama saya tak dengar orang nasihatkan saya macam ni doktor. Dah lama
juga saya tak jaga solat saya. Asyik tinggal saja." - Johan
" Jangan putus asa, Johan. Allah ada. Awak jaga solat, Allah akan jaga
awak. Awak berdoa dan minta tolong pada Dia, Dia pasti akan bantu awak.
Awak hanya perlu bersungguh-sungguh. Ingat ya, Johan? Hati kita ni, Allah
yang punya. Serahkan hati kita kepada Allah." - Iman
This conversation also reminds me how important of our prayers. I can relate
with my work too. Memang tiap-tiap kali nak pergi kerja, doa banyak-banyak
semoga Allah bantu. Alhamdulillah, even though I feel a bit sad because I
don't have much opportunities to work with female senior doctors, I feel
blessed that most of the male seniors that I've been working with are VERY
HELPFUL. I believe Allah is helping me through them - their knowledge and
experiences.
4. Umat Islam memang memerlukan ramai doktor pakar.
This hits me a lot. Huhuhu. Maybe because I am still contemplating of
furthering studies or simply stay in this position till Allah knows when.
"Dulu, profesor saya pernah nasihatkan, dia cakap: pertama, tak ramai
orang Muslim yang berjaya sempai ke peringkat tertinggi dalam perubatan.
Kedua, bila kita nak treat pesakit kita, rasa lebih nikmat apabila kita
tahu cara terbaik untuk merawat. Bayangkan jika kita tak ada ilmu
perubatan, sedangkan mereka perlukan pertolongan. Bagaimana kita nak
bantu?" - Iman
"Terakhir sekali dia kata, apabila dah jadi specialist, physically kita
akan lebih banyak masa untuk luangkan dengan family kita. Cuma yang
diperlukan adalah otak kita. Gaji pun bertambah, ada waktu hanyak perlu on
call dari rumah sahaja." - Iman
Huhuhu....
Tapi nak sambung belajar balik tu... mashaAllah perasaan dia, serba salah
betul. A lot of things need to be considered - money, place, family the most
important. Based on my seniors sharing, ramai je yang bergolak rumahtangga
bila ada yang sambung belajar. All need patience and understanding, right?
5. Dosa
"Dosa ini, pada awalnya memang kita rasa berat. Rasa gelap. Kita rasa
sesal dan gelisah. Tapi, bila kita dah selalu buat, hati kita akan jadi
gelap dari hari ke hari, sehingga kita tidak lagi merasai bahawa dosa itu
satu dosa." - Ustazah Norhafizah
"Hati kita sudah desensitize dengan maksiat. Apa yang berlaku bila kita
dah tak sensitif? Dosa tu jadi perkara biasa. Kita tak sedar dosa tu satu
kesalahan. Apabla ada orang tegur, kita melenting. Apabila solat, kita dah
tak rasa manis beribadah. Apabila baca Quran, kita susah nak menangis." -
Ustazah Norhafizah
So true.
-----------
Generally, the content is actually heavy but I glad that Muharikah managed to
tackle it and produce the product with a light read :) There are too many
things we can learned from this novel, insyAllah.
Good job, Muharikah :)
I can't wait to share my reviews on the sequels too :D
SM, Perak, Malaysia
200610
The Art of Letting God by Mizi Wahid | Book Review
June 6, 2020
I have my eyes on this book for months but keep on postponing because of the
price -_-'. I know RM50 is not that much for a book, to be exact a hard
covered book. But as I have spent hundredssss of ringgit during the previous
Big Bad Wolf, I need to calm myself from buying new books until I read at
least a quarter of books I bought from BBW hehe.
So, here I am!
I managed to grab it at a discounted price during Pesta Buku Iman and I can
say I love it so much! The book arrived just before Ramadhan, so I have spent
the whole Ramadhan reading it, slowly. I even brought it to the hospital and
shared things I read with my colleagues, then we ended up sharing our own
experiences. It was lovely, alhamdulillah.
Title: The Art of Letting God
Author: Mizi Wahid
Pages: 147
Publisher: Iman Publications
Publication Date: March 2019
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Back cover of The Art of Letting God. |
Anyway, while writing this, I realised I don't have much book reviews on
non-fiction (?) Actually I've been known by my family as a person who lacks
fiction imagination haha, so I tried my best to read lots of fiction books to
improve it.
Allow me to share snippets or beautiful verses from this book :)
1. The greatest temptation many of us find most challenging to deal with in life - is the temptation to give up.
This is very true, we have the temptation to quit whatever we are doing, for
various reasons - financial problem, family problem, lost of focus, emotional
attacks etc. But, the moment we managed to overcome this temptation, that's
the beauty of success. It actually can be seen as one point in life, but to be
honest, life is continuous journey so to overcome it needs life long courage
and support.
In this book, the author described more about Prophet Moses (p.b.u.h) who was
not only asking Allah for ease in affairs but strength, wisdom, patience,
ability and support :)
2. Tawakkul is the word used to imply one's act of reliance on God or "trusting in His plan". It is also seen as "perfect trust in God, and complete reliance on Him alone.
Reading this verse, reminds me on previous conversation with a friend of mine
who is an atheist. Medical school was a hard time. To get through each tests
and years, I learned a lot about tawakkal and really, success is not only
about studying smart but the idea of having Allah to rely on after our hard
works.
"Tie your camel first and then put your trust in Allah."
She mentioned to me how stressful she was and asked how do Malaysians can
remain calm. Haha. Only if she could see hurricanes in our hearts :D
"Maybe because most of us are Muslims? We usually leave it to God after we
tried our best during the process of revising."
"Oh, I don't believe in God, but I believe my success will be from my hard
work, that's why I need to study more."
In my heart... no wonder. Penat sebenarnya bila kita terlalu bergantung pada
kemampuan sendiri sebab manusia memang bukan perfect, akan ada kesilapan dan
kelemahan.
3. Believe that nothing just happens. Instead, everything happens for a good reason. And everything happens for you, not against you.
Most of times, we tend to argue about others rizq and complained why such
opportunities do not come to us. And we tend not to realised how much other
rizq have Allah blessed us with. Some may have a good occupation and income,
but he may not have children yet. Some may be blessed with children but having
difficulties in work.
The author also mentioned about the tools and ingredients to success that we
may already have but we don't realised it - so, we ended up to keep wondering
about our unanswered prayers.
"If all of you were to truly have faith in Allah s.w.t. He will
certainly provide you with sustenance, just as He would give to a little
bird, for when it leaves its nest in the morning with an empty stomach,
but returns home in the evening full."
4. Friends, reject the cup of poison. Instead, drink from the fountain of faith, the reservoir of resilience, and the sea of spiritual confidence.
In the book, this part was described as we are exposed to lots of "poison"
which would murder our thoughts and destroy our peace and happiness to its
death.
I believe most of us have our own experiences.
Rejections from other people.
Bad words that push us down.
Refuse that poisons, reject that unproductive comments, go beyond.
5. "How do we know if we've forgiven somebody, and have completely moved on?"
The author listed down few check lists to see where we are and how much
further we need to go to finally achieved the term 'completely moved on'.
- Are we still interested to know about them?
- Do we feel our blood boiling when we hear their name being mentioned in a conversation?
- Do we feel awkward when we bump into the person?
- Are our emotions still at the mercy of our senses being triggered by old memories?
- Do we feel unhappy when someone tells us about the person's happiness?
- Are we secretly stalking them?
I agree with the author with letting Gold be the one to "teach our enemies a
lesson". We don't have to be one as Allah surely know the best lesson to give
with the perfect timing.
"Those who spend in prosperity and in adversity, who suppress anger,
and forgive others, verily, Allah loves those who do good." (Quran
3:134)
Let it go and let God :)
"Experience genuine peace in your life when you learn how to love in
moderation, fear within limits and hate within reason."
6. Each new day, deserves a brand new beginning. Let go of yesterday's hurts, begin the day in the name of Allah. Just as He magnificently heals all of our physical wounds, trust in Him to supernaturally heal our emotional and spiritual wounds too.
I love the part "Never back away from opportunities to help others who are
struggling, by making a positive difference in their lives"
despite having this kind of thought, "But I'm not good enough".
Humans are never perfect.
Humans do make mistakes.
Even the first human Allah created - Prophet Adam, fell with persuasions of
Iblis and eventually being casted out from Paradise, Prophet Adam repented for
his sins and became the first Messenger of ALlah to humanity.
I know we are not prophet, but from this story, we need to believe that humans
make mistake and Allah is always there to forgive us more that we are to
forgive ourselves.
Beautiful :)
SM, Perak, Malaysia
200606
Tell Me Three Things by Julie Buxbaum | Book Review
April 14, 2020
I bought this book in Popular prior to previous BBW visit. Actually I separated books I bought from BBW and the rest so that I would like to make sure I read at least half of BBW books (just to feel it worth my money travelling to KL for them haha). But somehow this book look attractive though.
Title: Tell Me Three Things
Author: Julie Buxbaum
Pages: 325
Publisher: Delacorte Press
Publication Date: April 2016
Synopsis:
This book is about Jessie Holmes's life approximately 2 years after the death of her mother. His father got married to a woman he met online, subsequently lead to Jessie's moving to a brand new life in Los Angeles. Jessie knew no one there except her father, new stepmother and stepmother's son.
Few earliest days there, Jessie got an email from anonymous, Somebody/Nobody (SN) who offer to navigate her around without meeting each other in real life. After Jessie slowly making friends there, she was still in contact with SN, while trying to find out who SN was (who seemed to be a guy).
There are about 3 guys in the novel, Ethan Marks - Jessie's partner in some literature project, Liam Sandler - son of a saleswoman who hired her to work in a bookstore, and Caleb - a guy she met in the wrong class, sharing about his summer vacation.
Who is SN? Why is he messaging her?
1. “Perfect days are for people with small, realizable dreams. Or maybe for all of us, they just happen in retrospect; they're only now perfect because they contain something irrevocably and irretrievably lost.”
Jessie lost her mother to cancer at the age of 14 (I guess), and that's approximately the age girls start to become teenagers and somehow mothers are to whom girls will turn, to get further life guidelines.
Through the novel, I can always feel that she missed her mother a lot. The way she counted the days her mother left her, it showed it was never easy for her to forget. And to be real, I believe it is really difficult to move on and live with the memories.
And I love the part where Rachel (Jessie's stepmom) bought flight tickets for her for a weekend trip to Chicago to meet her old friends and to enjoy her known, familiar neighborhood. Rachel is one of the stepmoms who are not... I mean, mean?
2.
I love this part too!
Deep inside, I really hope SN is a good person for Jessie. You know, sometimes I can't help to think that there is someone around Jessie (maybe) planning to trick her on thing like this. T_T
But, I am glad, SN IS A GOOD ONEEEE! :D
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Maybe enough with two. All in all, the story is cute and adorable, though I found it tiring to know the mysterious SN, which was finally exposed at the few final pages of the novel. T_T The three guys are interesting too, I mean, the author somehow managed to trick me into doubting myself to guess which one is SN.
I am a slow reader currently, reading takes a lot of time, making a review as well. Haha.
Till then.
p/s - I can't help to read SN as Staff Nurse -_-'
My rating: ★★★★☆
Who is SN? Why is he messaging her?
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1. “Perfect days are for people with small, realizable dreams. Or maybe for all of us, they just happen in retrospect; they're only now perfect because they contain something irrevocably and irretrievably lost.”
Jessie lost her mother to cancer at the age of 14 (I guess), and that's approximately the age girls start to become teenagers and somehow mothers are to whom girls will turn, to get further life guidelines.
Through the novel, I can always feel that she missed her mother a lot. The way she counted the days her mother left her, it showed it was never easy for her to forget. And to be real, I believe it is really difficult to move on and live with the memories.
And I love the part where Rachel (Jessie's stepmom) bought flight tickets for her for a weekend trip to Chicago to meet her old friends and to enjoy her known, familiar neighborhood. Rachel is one of the stepmoms who are not... I mean, mean?
2.
I love this part too!
Deep inside, I really hope SN is a good person for Jessie. You know, sometimes I can't help to think that there is someone around Jessie (maybe) planning to trick her on thing like this. T_T
But, I am glad, SN IS A GOOD ONEEEE! :D
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Maybe enough with two. All in all, the story is cute and adorable, though I found it tiring to know the mysterious SN, which was finally exposed at the few final pages of the novel. T_T The three guys are interesting too, I mean, the author somehow managed to trick me into doubting myself to guess which one is SN.
I am a slow reader currently, reading takes a lot of time, making a review as well. Haha.
Till then.
p/s - I can't help to read SN as Staff Nurse -_-'
My rating: ★★★★☆
SM, Perak, Malaysia
200414
Moonlight Over Manhattan by Sarah Morgan | Book Review
December 21, 2019
I bought this book just because the synopsis sounds cozy to be read in December, where Christmas is just around the corner. I believe some of us feel the same too, the urge of watching movies involving snow, winter, Christmas when it comes to December, right?
Title: Moonlight Over Manhattan
Author: Sarah Morgan
Pages: 376
Publisher: HQ
Publication Date: October 2017
Synopsis:
Harriet, the dog walker is known for her shyness and lack of confidence compared to her twin sister, Fliss who always be the speaker for her - until she realizes everyone has their own life to live to, including Fliss. After Fliss moved out from their house to another town to get married, Harriet needs to survive on her own. Since then, Harriet comes with a idea of Challenge Harriet - doing things that she normally would never do.
On the other hand, there is Dr Ethan, who end up fated to meet Harriet, as a result of Challenge Harriet. Thought that will be the only meeting between both of them, the world actually wants them to meet again and again, for the sake of Madi, Ethan's sister's dog - in which at the end Harriet moves into Ethan's place to take care of Madi. Ethan is clueless about taking care of a dog and he can't spend lots of time with Madi.
Living together surely blossom things around them. Harriet slowly become comfortable with Ethan, pushing the boundaries, till the time Harriet exposes her love to Ethan, where Ethan ends up reply nothing to her.
What will happened to the chemistry between both of them?
"Do one thing every day that scares you." - Eleanor Roosevelt
I think this is my first book by Sarah Morgan and I just knew that there are few other books in this series. Seems like this book can be read as a standalone as I don't find any difficulties to read through it :)
1. "What makes you so wise?"
"Age and experience."
I believe as we grow older, we tend to do stuffs more confidently, or maybe at least we feel calm. With time, it helps to develop our skills and knowledge on how to encounter specific problems. Same in life, we tend not to hold on grudges and anger for too long as we don't feel it is even necessary. Move forward and live the life.
2. "Skill is the ability to do something well. That usually involves two elements - training and practice. Being a doctor is all about training and practice. It's not magic.
A thing I look forward to read was the journey of Dr Ethan, who is currently a ER (emergency room) trauma team leader in one of the most prestigious hospital in New York. Oh myy, I can totally relate whenever the author describe the situation of ER there, including how Dr Ethan need to face the reality of that department.
The advice helps to reflect there are so many things to be improved in my career life. :)
3. "You always see the best in people."
Harriet said that sometimes she is trying to see the best because she just don't want to believe that people can be so unkind. Sometimes, I feel it is easy but on the other times, I struggle to do the mentioned above. Working in the area, it needs me to meet all kind of people, the rich, the poor, the lovely, the shitty, the kind, the unkind, the most calm, the most annoy - it involves a lot of energy to entertain humans. Haha.
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The book is surely one to go if you want to enjoy and relax :)
SM, Perak, Malaysia
191221
A book I bought during recent Big Bad Wolf. After realising the Kuala Lumpur International Book Fair is coming soon, I think I should start reading my TBR list so that I don't have to feel guilty to maybe buy some more, perhaps? :)
Title: Write This DownSynopsis:
Author: Claudia Mills
Pages: 248
Publisher: Farrar, Straus and Giroux (BYR)
Publication Date: September 2016
The book is about a twelve-year-old Autumn, who was closed to her brother, Hunter when they were young. But Hunter who is going through a rebellious, trying-to-find-his-own-path phase, keep on doing stuffs that annoyed Autumn and frustrating their parents.
Hunter is not into academics and sports, while Autumn is excellent in at least academics and kinda acceptable in ballet so Hunter felt left out when the parents seem not to understand his passion and keep on pushing him to do stuffs he dislike.
Autumn has a crush on Cameron, a friend in her journalism class. Cameron is actually a brother of David, where David is Hunter's band mate. There was one day where Hunter and his band mates accidentally read Autumn's poems for Cameron and since then Hunter keep on making fun of her sister for the cheesy lines. Since then, Autumn is passionate on getting her writing to be published to prove Hunter that her talent is not that bad.
There were ups and downs for Autumn to be a recognized writer. At first, the story line was bit boring for me as it shows how Autumn as a complicated girl, who always think of so many possible results of one specific event. Read the book and you will understand when I said Autumn thinks too much.
"She might even write something about him to show the world what a terrible brother he's turned out to be. But what if publication comes at the cost of revealing painful family secrets? Is being published worth hurting those you love?"
From the book, there are few things I learned.
Oh, I love Autumn's name, anyway, as much as I love the name Summer. :)
1. "Personal essays have a theme. They take the writer's personal experience and find some universal truth in it."
Well, seem this book has a lot to do with writing, these specific sentences remind me of blogging. There were few times, my friends asked me why I love blogging and why exactly I love reading stories of others?
That's the answer, I guess. Reading stories help me to learn new stuffs and at least learn about myself too.
Little did I know it happened in the Western world too. Haha.
When my mother called me by my full name, I know there is something that needs explanation. :D
In this book, there is a part of Autumn's journalism class that shares about how a review should be. Well, this is a subjective question to me, but the things Ms. Archer, Autumn's teacher described are quite nice to ponder on what good contents should have.
But, still, I am writing reviews my style and I see no problem as I am writing for self reflections and memories. :) Hehe
Oh myy, this is very true. In this current world we are living, words are obviously something that can soothe someone yet can also kill people. I still remember few patients coming to ED with alleged assault by family member, mentioned that they usually being attacked mentally with those harsh words before the physical assault came into picture.
Enough with four above, I guess. :)
------------
So...
Do Autumn gets to know Cameron at the end? What happen to them?
Do Autumn managed to get her writing published?
What will happen to the relationship between Autumn and her brother, Hunter?
What about their family?
I must say, the ending is cute actually :)
SM, Perak, Malaysia
191221
Detour by Raudhatul Hifza | Book Review
March 27, 2018
Despite the busy working days, I decided to have a goal of reading at least one book per month. It was a bit hard to keep in track as I don't have the luxury to read the book in the hospital and upon reaching home, I am already tired to even hold a book.
Memang bila pegang buku nak baca, the next moment I wake up... it is already 5am plus and I need to get ready for another working day.
So, after analyzing the trend, I got the pattern; to read few pages for 5-10 minutes in the morning while having my breakfast before leaving the house for work.
And finally I finished reading a book! :D
Title: Detour
Author: Raudhatul Hifza
Pages: 268
Publisher: Iman Publication
Publication Date: Jan 2018
There is no specific synopsis of this book unless you haven't read Hiatus. Oh, this book is kind of a sequel of Hiatus, just it is not written by Budak Tomato (I think?) and to be honest I imagine Muharikah is the one who wrote this piece. WAllahualam.
In this book, you can get a better understanding of Hiatus, from Raudhah's point of views.
A good, simple book to be honest, with not much cliffhanging parts but I am a bit disappointed with another open-ending book. Tapi, dah tu penulis nak buat, I can do nothing but to read, observe and apply the lessons I've learned from it.
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1. Be the person who can bring someone closer to Allah (together with us).
I believe I can relate well to the verse as Raudhah and I share the same career. Alhamdulillah I haven't deal with dying patients yet in this department, hopefully not but I believe it is something unavoidable in the hospital. Patients can die every day.
In O&G, it is more towards happiness of welcoming a newborn into this world. But, there are tears as well. Some women who really want a baby but unable to have one. Some women who got pregnant and really treasure their pregnancies suddenly came to the hospital because of per vaginal bleeding and upon examinations, they are diagnosed to have miscarriages T_T
'Bukan rezeki saya, kan doktor?' while shedding her tears.
Only Allah knows how sad I am to deal with this. But, I need to be professional as well even though quite a few times, I got carried away with this empathy emotion. What I can do is to calm them (in a rush, I need to help with other patients too) and reassured that 'Allah nak bagi yang lebih baik untuk akak. Akak pun muda lagi, insyAllah nanti akak cuba lagi ya.'
2. Rejection is another part of learning.
Well, rejection is my daily meal in the hospital. Well, it is for my own good anyway. Rejections really help me to improve on how to present cases, how to decide on the plans and the most importantly, why I need to perform such examinations and how to persuade patients.
Like, in O&G, not all cases we need to do vaginal examination (known as check jalan). In fact, there is another way to check the vagina - per speculum (orang panggil masuk mulut itik kat bawah) which is usually done if pregnant women complained of leaking liquor (rasa macam ada air mengalir lah doktor)
Same goes to abdominal ultrasound. In some cases, we need to do trans-vaginal ultrasound (masuk probe ultrasound melalui vagina untuk nampak organ peranakan lebih jelas) instead of trans-abdominally. But, we still need to respect the patients if they refuse any.
- 'Dah dia taknak, kita tak boleh paksa, Hanis. Yang penting, kita dah bagitahu baik buruk sesuatu prosedur tu dan make sure tulis dalam fail dia yang dia refuse.'
3. This too shall pass.
Every time I feel down with my own achievement, I always pat myself, "You have done the best for now, there are always rooms for improvement. And this too shall pass."
I hope my ability to work will be more efficient and fast with time. Ameen.
4. Dealing with depressed person.
I love how the author described this part well.
It is not that easy to deal with these people in real life. Theory and words are totally different than in reality. People are too different from each other. But, I think that I can use this as a guideline.
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All in all, this book is a bit monotonous but I believe that if we read this book for the sake of just to finish it, we will reach to higher disappointment. Anyway, if you have read Hiatus, I would highly recommend this one to continue reading after Hiatus :)
My rating: ★★★☆☆
M, Perak, Malaysia
180327
Breathe by Beni Rusani | Book Review
January 30, 2018
While in preparation with all documents needed to start working, I am so happy I managed to read this book. I mean, another non-academic book. Haha is it really non-academic, Nina? I bet there are lots of medical knowledge inside it. :D
I just knew Popular (at least in AEON Klebang) does not sell Breathe by Beni Rusani. Don't really understand why this bookstore prefer this way, Doesn't the store know this is one of the best-selling books? I ended up buying it from MPH in AEON Kinta City. Funny isn't it, how Ipoh itself has three AEON malls!
 |
| Front cover. |
Title: Breathe
Author: Beni Rusani
Pages: 260
Publisher: WhiteCoat Enterprise
Publication Date: April 2017
Synopsis:
Basically, it is about Dr. Adam who is now a cardiologist working in National Heart Institute. And ironically a cardiologist suffered a heart attack while he was jogging. The book reminisces Adam's current situations and his memories back in 2003+- when he was a houseman (junior doctor who just start working)
This book also covers his love life, friendships, colleagues and a bit on family.
 |
| Back cover. |
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A simple (yet complicated) story but a very interesting one as it is medical-related and I managed to understand most of the terms, diseases, managements mentioned in this novel.
1. Life as a houseman.
It will be my life very soon. Just around the corner. In this novel, I can imagine how blur it will be on the very first day of working. Unsure what to do, where to go etc. But, I can observe how Dr. Adam struggled to maintain to be there, in his shoes as a houseman.
Be ready to admit that I lack clinical experiences.
Be ready to accept the fact that I need to learn hard and smart with all procedures - not on mannequins but real patients.
Improve and remember basic ideas on everything I do.
- "Practice and practice until you bleed. It'll make you a better doctor." - Prof. Black
- "Remember our mantra: See one. Do one. Teach one." - Mad Doc
- "Your eye bags are not imperfections. It's a testimony to your hard work and dedication to your profession." - Prof. Black
 |
| Life goal. |
2. Move on.
Really. Easier said than done.
Move on in this case does not only mean letting go of failed relationship.
But, letting go all the failure, mistakes in life.
Doctors witness death almost every single day. From medical staffs point of view, I can understand how many doctors I've met admit that they end up losing the normal reaction towards death - patients' death. I am a bit afraid to be like that as well.
In this novel, we can appreciate how doctors actually cannot move on from their patients' deaths. Especially their very first one. T_T It basically give huge impact in their own life, even for the experienced doctors - losing patient after trying everything he can do - can be torturing.
- "To enter the light, you have to let go of your past."
- "Someone I look up to once told me, horrible things could happen in medicine. Patients can die on us. We must learn from it and move on. So we can help the next patients."
- "Forgiving others seemed easy while forgiving yourself was hard."
There are many more life lessons I can extract from this book. But, I think these two are enough for me now. :)
Pray that I will be a competent doctor.
Pretty please <3
My rating: ★★★★★
SS, Perak, Malaysia
180130
Our Chemical Hearts by Krystal Sutherland | Book Review
January 14, 2018
No specific reason I bought this novel. -_-' Just because the book was arranged on the same rack as I Believe in a Thing Called Love. Oh maybe the geometric cover of the book is captivating? Haha. Actually the cover is a new version as I have seen the previous cover of this title.
 |
| Our Chemical Hearts by Krystal Sutherland |
Title: Our Chemical Hearts
Author: Krystal Sutherland
Pages: 313
Publisher: G.P. Putnam's Sons
Publication Date: October 2016
Synopsis:
It is about Henry Page who is still a virgin at 17 years old and finally become interested into a girl when he gets to know a new girl in his school, Grace Town. Grace is not a typical heroin when she does not appear fashionable, beautiful etc. Instead, she wears oversized boys' clothes and even use a cane to walk. They are connected to each other after they are assigned as school magazine editors.
Henry tries to get to know her and slowly her secrets are revealed.
Can Henry accept Grace the way she is now, with all the broken pieces of her?
Can Grace accept Henry in the condition she is stuck in?
And what are actually the reasons behind Grace walking with a cane and the mysteries evolve around her?
 |
| Back side of the book with the synopsis |
--------------------------------
Honestly, it took me a while to finally finish reading the book. It is not because the story line is not good but personally it is a heart breaking story. T_T I need to rest a bit before indulging more into the reasons of Grace behaving like a mysterious person and to slowly accept the fact that my heart is slowly torn.
Beautiful story of unrequited love.
Sorry I am spoiling the plot. I feel very sad as I read the final chapter of the book.
1. "And all the while I loved her, just as she loved him. In secret, between the shadow and the soul." - Henry
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| "It's beautiful." - Henry "It's sad, I think. Not beautiful." - Grace |
This is a poem by Pablo Neruda, shown quite early in the novel when Henry and Grace have different perspective towards those verses.
"I love you as certain dark things are to be loved,
in secret, between the shadow and the soul."
The poem is replayed quite few times through out the book (if I am not mistaken) and it actually represents the feeling of Grace at that time. Grace changed into someone different after the incident happened to her turning her life upside down, like totally hundred and eighty degrees. T_T
Do you feel sad when you read the poem? Or happy?
2. Describe yourselves.
Grace is artistic with her words, so do Henry. If we refer to the title of the book, Our Chemical Hearts, we will understand better the title is beautifully describing the story between them.
 |
| "Don't you find it strange that whenever anyone asks you to describe yourself, you draw a blank?" |
I nodded when I read this line. Exactly.
Sometimes we don't even understand ourselves and that's maybe why we can't easily describe us. Or simply as what Henry said, "There's a lot to cover."
3. Words - speaking or writing?
Both of them are excellent in writing. But in this novel, it portrays the reason why Grace stopped writing and expresses herself more via speech - when she's speaking with Henry of course.
Some of us are blessed with high confidence level in front of people - to actually give speech. Meanwhile some others are better in confidence via written words. Anyhow, both are still important to live a life, I think? You can't speak via written words when you are on the phone or in any interviews. And you can't talk when you actually need to write an essay. Right?
"You lose the rawness, the truth of who you are if you pass everything through a screen first." - Grace
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| 'Struggle to get the exact message' |
So, which one are you - public speaking or writing?
I am on Henry's team. :D
4. Henry's Drafts
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| 'a hymn in the web of your veins' wow |
No wonder Henry is assigned to edit the magazine, look how beautiful his choices of words!
I love reading poems though most of the times I look forward to stories behind them to understand more. I love quotes even though they can only be my favourite based on my emotions at that time. I love beautiful verses as they can leave permanent spots in my heart (even though they will make me cringe most of the time hahaha)
5. "You're wounded right now, but you'll heal."
In this novel, you'll be amazed with how supportive people around Henry - his parents, his sister - Sadie, his loyal friends - Murray and Lola etc.
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| "Have you ever really been happy with her? - Sadie asked Henry |
Time will heal the wound - any kinds of wound. Not to permanently erase as wounds always leave scars - but, time will help people to adapt to the changes afterwards. Beautifully.
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If you expect a happy ending, read the novel to judge yourselves. Hehe.
SS, Perak, Malaysia
180114
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